When I was in my early 20's, I moved with my then hubby from the cornfields of Indiana to the land of "fruits and nuts," or what I lovingly refer to as Southern California, San Diego specifically.
Early into the relationship, our roles quickly became defined. We were each others cheerleaders. I was the breadwinner and he was the full time law student. He was my sounding board as I launched my career and in return I made sure we had a roof over our heads and food on the table. While the marriage lasted the length of law school, I lasted longer. I liked the land of "fruits and nuts". It suited me. He, on the other hand, packed up and headed back to the cornfields. No harm, no foul. Once we both got on our feet, we didn't need each other anymore. While it may seem like a sad story, it wasn't. Our relationship served a purpose...
After I waved goodbye, my life in San Diego took flight. If someone poured me a glass of new age Kool-Aid, I drank it all and asked for more. I did the The Course in Miracles, rebirthing, Werner Erhard's EST program, and on Sunday's, The Church of Religious Science led byTerry Cole Whitaker. While on my self discovery journey, I came across a book, Loving Relationships by Sondra Ray.
This thin book sparked an important insight... "Know The Purpose Of Your Relationship." Really?... Earlier in my life, it never entered my mind that friendships have a beginning and an end. Guys, yes. Boyfriends come and go. Girlfriends are forever... until they aren't. I am not talking about relationships with the clerk at your local grocery store or your favorite hair stylist. I am talking about those that make an imprint on your heart.
While I am on the other side of 60 , this phrase continues to be a guidepost. What do each of us bring to the table? Each relationship I have is like a square that creates a treasured quilt and tells a unique story. Some squares radiate inspiration, others spark joy, some offer strength and love...Whatever they reflect, sewn together their beauty takes my breath away. There are even a few I have no clue why they are in my quilt and that's okay. Maybe someday I will. Brenda I. makes up one of those squares. We met very randomly while walking on the sidewalk in Staunton Virginia one clear evening this past summer. Her friendship just feels good and that's all I need to know.
So if you are a quilter, and even if aren't, maybe next time you will look at the quilt hanging before you a bit differently and think about your squares.
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